all 'bout devlin loves

memories, inhearts

2009-06-16T08:04:00.000-07:00

Florence, after reading your post i was really touched. All these years, we really been thru so much that we never expected and now everything was over, it was a relief but it would be goodbye for all of us.

memories that will be kept forever, inhearts.

cant wait for it to come__!!

2009-05-31T11:22:00.000-07:00

jus couldnt imagine, gonna end this 3yrs of suffering, actually not really, did learnt alot of stuff and met all my good frens here.

I managed to spend some time with him over the weekend. Think of it, just to have him by my side it is really a bonus to me. Thou, keep telling myself to be contented with what I have but I jus couldnt help myself thinking and missing him. It is just only 1 day, but I have already miss him so much. jus wan to see him every single moment.

3rd June is the fashion show. superly excited, hopefully less busy, jus want that day to be hell lot of fun. cant wait to wear my lit.gorgeous dress.

recent me me me, think this new colour still suit me the best=)

My 3years..

2009-05-01T07:44:00.000-07:00

Horray, end of my bloody school days.-30.5.09= last day of school
I don't need to take the dhoby train and get all the hell scoldings worst is getting scolding for nothing.

For now, I just need to concentrate do well for my assessment
Upcoming work
would be doing my photoshoot for my catalogue.
hehe. today went to hortpark to take the setting of the place. really sweet and romantic. Definitely will update the pics wait for Rebecca to send me =P

Next would be my boards. doing catalogue.

After 3 years of hard work, ...MY GRAD SHOW. SO ANTICIPATING!!!!
( i wish he can come)

I will miss all my dear sweets. my chatty and eating buddy, florence.
. my happy and entertaining, xinhui.
. my steady clubbing mate, mandy.
. my most on rush project, huizhen.

Sure enough not to miss my grp mates. esp. fishy. I will miss your kp and ur funny jokes how you make me laugh till tummyache. and I will make you miss you too.

Lastly, sometimes i think of it thou we aint that close. treat me like a dessert but i really want the best for him that's the only thing i wish for. his wish is my wish.

It's the weekend P=

2009-04-17T10:00:00.000-07:00

Springcleaning!!!

here i am to wipe off the layers of dust.(months of it)

Today after days of rushing work nights, finally is shopping days.

.MY LOOTSS for the day.

Unique bangle. Favourite loot. Hagi Lane

.loves.

Cream Ruffle Skirt. Bugis Street.

Ribboned Shimmer Black Studs

Marc Jacobs Inspired Ribbon Studs.

Now's a little update on me. April has been a busy week with hells loads of work. critism. and stupid bitching.

eating and shopping is the best way to destress.

And until now, been worried for him cos things hasn't been going smoothly for him. Really hope things will turn out well for him and things surrounding him.

Miss him so badly. I want to see him soon!!

W.A.I.T

2009-03-04T10:22:00.000-08:00

Many times you told me, and all while I had these going thru in my mind.
You ever said to me,( all my exs are jerks and treated me unfairly, if you don go NO one can come in)this kind of silly stuff~~~ at first thought that you would be different, you're not jerk but ultimately i am still alone.
Tell me, In you, I cant even find true love what makes you think that the next one will be a better one. I have tried so long, for now I want to tell you that I'm tired and is dragging me. The reason for you to tell me to look for a better one is becos you dont want to feel guilty towards me as you cannot/dont want to love me, I dont want and no longer want to hear this anymore AND seriously i want to tell you Im sick and tired of all this. Since I am the only who is enduring then Let me SUFFER alone.

I cannot compare, at least now in my life I have met someone that I want to wait rather than not to get to meet someone that i think worth my wait.

In my heart, all I want is for you to be happy, nothing else matters.

For you, I'll b waiting you, love.patiently.

Full

2009-02-17T11:12:00.000-08:00

I hate the thought of me thinking that is me the one who thinks that- it is a hippo thing and you thinking that it is just a tini-weenie thing and i am kicking a fuss out of it.

Darn it, thou yesterday issue was over,[which you start and end it with lots of crap talking and laughter and you expect me to giggle about it and move on] but the obvious fact is i am totally serious about it. In fact, I do want to let you know how was i feeling, but this gut feeling tell me that it would be me the one who is convincing myself, trying to clear things up, rather than you. To you, yes it is just that!!!, and i would agree cos that's on the surface alright? but when i think of it, SERIOUSly it is not only this. In time to come, many more obstacles would just slowly appearing without us realising it. arhahh, to sound nice we bicker bout it, I couldnt expect the worse.

On the verge of crying, i had to repeatly tells myself that, i will be alright when everything is over just to make myself feel better as if nothing had happened before, or telling myself that i have been thinking too much. I tired of lying to myself anymore just like you sick and tired of making choices.

Literally, when did I ever ask you make choices and choose. To you, don't think and bother about it, it would remain as good it is. And leaving it to be, had caused me so much misery.

And today you told me that, i used to cry over difficult solvable things. Think again, do you ever see me cry? I don't need my tears to gain your sympathy and concern. That's why i would never ever allow myself to cry in front of you.

]if love allows me to fullstop and end this intrigue, i would.

in a whirl of confused

2009-02-15T06:09:00.000-08:00

never did i expect how hard for me to accept the painful truth. i keep defying myself but then the painful fact keep appearing in front of me.

after this huge period of time, i still find myself confused. i wanted to ask but i was afraid of the truth. you told me that truth hurts I startled becos I pondered will you really tell me the truth that hurts ( and seriously i m not afraid of getting hurt) or you think it hasn't been the time for me to know? I don't want to doubt you,

becos for those who don't trust your loved ones
can never ever find true love.

I jus want June to come and end so that i can truly tell myself that all this all come to an end.
Game Over.

Make Love Not War =)

2009-01-14T06:55:00.000-08:00

School starts couple days ago, but nightmares will come the next following week. Gosh, hence now -sleep-all-i-can. \

Out with my girlies today to chinatown. heh. brought the materials and fabric i wanted to do for his pressie. happy me. jus like that can keep me happy for the whole day. (Opps, forget to take pics!!!)

After chinatown, headed down to town. once again. saw the pressie but then xiaohua and mng say later shall go see, cos mandy gift more impt. alrights. and.... then forgets about my gift!!!

This coming weekend, I will go see on my own. haha. or I shall drag florence, you, and mng you to OG and have a look as you guys said OG is much cheaper. yupiee.

Sometimes. I was thinking I no longer wants to be secrective. Loving him is not only tiring, doing the things that I love for him also seems to be tiring. And I felt what's really dare to hide. It really piss me off.

.:.( For the angry her, since/ if you no longer have feelings for him, then there's no reason for you to be angry) Cheer up yea.

Fun &Madness-Prestat Slumber Party

2009-01-06T07:03:00.000-08:00

Yay. It's a Slumber Party. Our Very Own=PPP
sweet to have our own prestat balloon.

Mummy&Daughter. Loves

Sexy Mrs Joe.

Shane. 's Sexs Pose

Let's Vote Who's the sexier one.

Guys Sex Pose I

How can we miss out the Girlies?

We're so sporting.yay

The Best Twister Ever.
I'm goonna play this on nyd.

kick out mj. haah.

haha. fizz.

I'm so having a hard time.

saw me? doing stretchin exercise.

Finally. Prestat's Got Talent!!!!

Felicia posing./.
Belly dancing

My 'dance' partner. JOe

Devlin, I really look like a 'A' ar.

trying so hard to entertain the audience and judges.

Joe trying to be funny uh.

Judo!!!!!

Fizz

Me&Wirda=)

That's Yvonne

That's Ashiq

That's Joy.

Last. Reed.

Continuing with self-camwhore

So satisfiied with the pressie. Thanks. Loves..

All I need was...

2009-01-02T10:45:00.000-08:00

I don't know if god is giving me cos all these seems so tough for me, and if I can really pass thru these. The upcoming situations will totally be harmless to me.

What He Gave Me....

The feelings that I cannot be felt for

The sweet moments that cannot be lasted for

The uneasiness that I felt for her

And the fact that I cannot love him.

I ever told him, I'm really contented with the current us.

All I need was..

to see him

to felt for him

to make him happy,for him to be happy, and what more can I ask for?

It is ok not to be together, cos being together means there'll be a day that we both will be separated.

The one month news you need to know!!

2008-12-16T09:20:00.000-08:00

A deep deep sorry folks. Supposingly I shoudnt be that busy with this holiday, but then to buy more prexxie for you guys, had to earn that xtra cash, (psss.. you know who're)

Though I really hope hollis don end that soon, but hope that working days can pass faster. zzzzz hah!

Guess this is real soon, christmas is really coming. Wondering if we can get together for the steamboat gathering we had mentioned it earlier on.. keep our fingers crossed.. haha..

great news and congrats mummie!! After months of die hard swimming you finally get that swimming float fats out of you. really happy for you, keep up the good work..

gee. meet him up today, but I was stupidity sick, and still want to meet up. Lucky me, get to meet, how lucky i was yea. ......( should I get him the toy that I want to buy for him this coming xmas? or hope I can get a better gift)

I really really die die want to meet him before christmas cos i know the eve is not for me, wish me luck then.

That's all folks, I assured you I will post pics to interest my post better.

It has all gone away

2008-12-07T09:32:00.000-08:00

I was browsing thru her blog, the anger in me all seems to dissolve. I was really wondering why perhaps I try to see it at her perspective.

Can you imagine, you had spend so much time together, so so much, by then you should know or understand other party well, ultimately not only did not understand but then nothing had been acheived and accomplished worst ended up with nothing. pitiful is the word that comes to me. I then realise that I shouldnt have anger in me cos is pitiful enough.

This also acts as a warning to me that I cannot be that failure. It is a total failure.

Your Love; Your Biggest Bet.

random pixs of me being bored, I feel so dumb.

2008-11-30T05:55:00.000-08:00

This manequinn has arrived since weeks ago in my lovely room, now covered with dust so I decided to give some attention to it, it's A her.

That's so much of her! Now's my turn.. many many of me..

For the first time i enjoyed photoshop so muchh,

due to nothing better to do.

Pretty satisfied with the outcome.

(Pardon me, xiaohua, I know you will tag " where are all our pics?")

Despite being boreedd, I still miss him lotss..

used

2008-11-25T23:31:00.000-08:00

used.

All these time, I never ever felt that I'm being used, thou many times you told me not to be stupid, not to waste time on a person that will never love you back and to love myself.

because, I felt that

loving someone that I really love is not stupid.

spending time with my loved one is simply not wasting time.

loving you is equivalent to loving myself.

You will ask me is it worth it? The years, the youth, the heartbreaks? Whether is it worth it or not, I know best. I wont felt that I was being used for that incident but why you made it until I seemed to be used. I was wondering do you want me to feel that way, so i would bother you less.

Nothing from you..., I don expect a call, but i believe a sms is not too much to ask for right? It should be pleasant and memorable, but the after thing is bothering me more than it should.

why allow me have second thoughts for it.

honest thoughts and words

2008-11-21T10:34:00.000-08:00

Hey reader,
you know who you are, Yes, it's you.
And I know once you read it, you would definitely continue reading it.
Thanks for reading!
Alright, shall update more =)))))

In fact, wondering is that is my mind all about you that nearly all my entries is about you.

Never hear from you for more than 2days,
Don't see you appearing in msn
Did not randomly call me
No meet-ups in a week
Could'nt sleep, thinking of you, wondering if u are asleep.
Can sleep also think of u,hoping that my dream appears to be u.n only you
Before I sleep, wishing that you would wish me good night. But i know it can only happen in my dream.
Though, you did not treat me that well, I still feel that you are still the best of 'all'.
Even out with my friends, nevertheless still thinks about you.

The earlier ones that I've mention can instantly kill me, and draining me till the very last bit. It is just like my world revolves only you and me.

Yes, I know you will be thinking and this is what you had always been telling me perhaps when i stepped into in the working industry, all these will changed

but i can tell you, I never ever felt so much for a person, till now.

I know it is kinda over and dramatic but this is honestly how I feel, not cocking anything up.

Felt slightly better, after throwing emotions here.

Dear friends who loves me, esp flor, keep on prompting me to update. I admit that laziness had made me not updating the pics that we have gone dating, but is all in friendster and facebook. Shall do so next time.

love is a series of disappointments

2008-11-11T08:08:00.000-08:00

Everything was well, just that he was very blue towards me.

I really deserved it! nobody can treat me good, when he treated me well, I'm was overwhelmed. And when things went to the mono state again, totally stunned i just couldnt take it, and couldnt take any longer. Then, I rather did not have such good treatment from him.

This is him. Jus like a statistic graph.

Worst, the more you tried to convince yourself to give up, the unbearable pain fills you up.

Argh, shall see when it will go up again, then hope I m good enough to maintain my performance, bah.

Love will find a way

2008-11-05T11:41:00.002-08:00

Love will find a way.

Nearly 4am in the mornin, here blogging, I realised that i hasnt touch my blog for couple of weeks. That's terrible.

Lately, there is really alot of work to do. Group. Deadlines. AND Assessment=A killer.
I had no choice but train myself to be panda.

Since, cant get to sleep then photoshop these pix.

Hope all these killers can be gone soon. Luckily, burying myself into work is a relieve for love.

Keep my fingers cross for assessment =/

Nearly delete my blog.

2008-11-05T11:41:00.001-08:00

Late nite danelion

2008-10-21T11:47:00.001-07:00

This baby danelion, As I was browsing new desktop pic for my lappy, i come across this lovely danelion., and i felt that love should be like danelion.

It's emotionally peaceful, calm. ( though at times, you felt so hateful for love). This little thing blown by the bleezie wind and spread the love which is the seedlings to all parts of the little hearts of yours.

The idea of it, is to calm down and think what exactly you want for love. Somehow no point pressing and dwelling why things ended up in this way. This had happened to me before and it resulted to ( Why the drastic change in you, then u like so pissed***)
Like after so much you had done, and all you get was .... You had changed.

The whole thing turned out sour.

& if your love story is there hasnt been naturnal wind to to blow and spread your love.perhaps it is time for you to blow your own danelion.

Hugs danelion. dev.

I just want you to hold me and walk me thru the dark..

2008-10-19T10:44:00.000-07:00

little things are just so simple, yet we complicate it, like love, care, being thoughtful.

Intentionally, I did not want you to love me, i don't need your love.

All i want was you to hold me, and walk me thru the dark. walk me thru the difficult times and seriously, I will be fine. I always wanted to be your fren, becos friends are forever, there is no such thing as eternal love.

For now things had become so much better, that I'm so unwilling to let go. yet i had such thinking..
(izzit becos i know we will eventually come to an end)
Hence, this is the best alternative for the both of us?

My Wishful thoughts...
I. one starry night, bring me under that galaxy of stars.
II. always there, feelings unattatched.
III. Lastly, when years come by, just hope the love is left unchanged.

Florence Birthday Bash

2008-10-10T08:46:00.000-07:00

Florence-xiaoflower birthday..

Is there a need for words?

Pics says it all.

We had so much fun.love all.

Sleeping is a killer

2008-10-07T10:54:00.000-07:00

recently, I had been like so tired. I really don't know what is seriously wrong with me. Being exhausted, is like so dreadful.

No focus in doing my late work.

telling yourself to keep awake, yet the more you feel tired.

Actually, there's a lot of work to be done, bloody assessments is nearing, day by day.

All i ask is alittle more energy. thanks god (=

She's back, i supposed? Hence, he's like totally gone vanish--

guys? are all guys appeared the way they should.?

2008-09-27T13:50:00.000-07:00

sunny,breezie day..indeed today was the second day of the UOB-related F1 job.

Hah. thinking that ytd was hell, today was worse.

\Okay, before i become naggy again, or before u try typing another person blogspot.

to take a look at the picx..

***Killing boredom***

my 2nd day old gf. happy working.

yesterday ended 12plus by then reach home it's bout 1.

today ended even later. perhaps is because had more things to do.

Tomorrow will be the finals.

the inners.

When the cars pass by at 2++km/h. your diaphragm would even vibrate.

pungent rubber smell. like the track fm gate 6 which near fullerton to UOB plaza.

yup. it travels that far.

shall not go on& on.

end with a smile (=

searching for that special one

2008-09-22T08:12:00.000-07:00

jus gone thru someone blog, was inspired hence wanted to jot something down. There are certain times that we want behave how we wanted to, naturally. When feeling down, everybody hopes to have someone to turn to. Once again, where is the right person?

Worst, in mind, you take him as the person that you can confine but gradually you realise that he turn out not to be that special one. Wondering if you ever realise that very unlikely, that, boyfriends are your that special fren. Perhaps, at the start of the r/s , yes. but slowly, it ended up with a no..

How nice if we can just' let our emotions flow', like the way she mention..

2008-09-14T10:50:00.000-07:00

STAY OVER at LuLu House, A Girlie PJ party...

2008-09-14T10:28:00.000-07:00

EDIT 1---------------2------------------3-------------------

2008-09-14T10:15:00.000-07:00

Ok, girlies... no more thankfully. But, come and think of it, gonna thank me again, cos' i finally update my stuff so u girlies will have different things to read... I know. -_-"' once again is entertaining u all for 5 mins. hehe.
Opps, dono wad to write le. Jus like my report, now rushing for my report. hell for me, cos only left with 1 wk of 'break'.
Hopefully, can finish everything by end of week.
joyhoy holis~~
GIRLIES.next holis destination.our beyond paradise.rendang.

The 2nd Ferris Wheel

2008-08-14T10:57:00.000-07:00

Thankfully, it is the 2nd time on the motianlun.
Intially, thought that i have to wait very long.
Joyful me, cos' someone is treating. How nice--.

on the ferris wheeeel

isaac & me

kerry.isaac.licia

mememe on the motianlun.

Crappy Moments. rawh-rawh

Say so much le, heh, tis iis the yida fren isaac who is treating.

2008-04-14T19:06:00.000-07:00

Kerrrryyy & Me on 20th birthday.
Mo Tian Lun* Flyer

LaLAlaLa- KTV-ing Time

The 4 notti-es

say cheese

alohaaaaaaa

Jus like to pinch her cheeks-

say yeah, intoducing me

Florence-gogogo master piece

I want to laugh at xinhui. the 70s a-gogogo

Once again, let's ahhee

sweet sweet love

snap snap**

gogogo yeah & me

yummy yum yum